Today, I am so thrilled to receive another award from EndoJoanna, a fellow Endo Sufferer who just undergone surgery last 15-November-2011 and is currently recuperating.  She is the brave, young woman behind Living With Endo and I am wishing her good luck as she move forward in her journey.  Please do find time to check her blog out.

Similar to the Liebster Blog Award, certain rules also applies in receiving this award:

• Thank the person who passed the award on to you.
• List 7 things that people may not know about you.
• Pass the award to 15 other bloggers and don't forget to notify them as well.

I must confess that thinking about those seven things to reveal about myself is never that easy.  I spent quite some time contemplating and here's what I came up with...

As a child, I think I was cute.  But you need not agree with me.  Here's a photo of mine when I was just one...  Lol!

I quit my job as a manager just to be with my dear husband whom, from this time forward, will be addressed to as Sir Bug.

I’m a sucker for Korean Dramas and 49 Days is among my favorites.  I cried a lot while watching it and I am pretty sure that I still will if I watch it again.

I really love the way Narcisa Malfoy pronounces Harry Potter’s death in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows 2 – “Dead!”

I love to eat and pig out!  I love to travel and explore different foods from different cultures.  One of my friends actually thinks that I have really weird taste buds.

A few years ago, an angry bird dropped its poop on my head while my brother and I were strolling down the mall – a very embarrassing moment indeed!

 

Red is my favorite color and it is my major preference in buying things.  This Red Slap Watch is one clear proof of my obsession.  I know this has nothing to do with red but I just love Slap Watch's Tagline – If it doesn’t say SLAP, it’s not a SLAP Watch!

So there goes the seven things that you may not know about me.

Now, what about the subject of passing the award to?

Alright!

Listed below are the 15 blogs that I have picked:

• BIAGO - Baby, If all Goes Optimally

• My Ordinary Miracles

• Hope Delayed

• Praying for a Pregnancy

• My Notes on TTC and Life

• My Infertility Road

• My Journey Through TTC... So Far

• Mummy, are there yet?

• A Blanket 2 Keep

• My Fertility Blog

• Bringing Home Baby

• Baby on my mind

• My Journey to Motherhood

• Our Wish

• Beckie's Infertility Journey

By the way, there's one blog that I really enjoy reading but did not include it in the list for the writer has been so open about almost everything that you'll easily felt connected to her.  I feel guilty ending this post without mentioning Mad Hatter of Late for a Very Important Pregnancy. She's been such an inspiration and I like her so much.

So ladies, please don't feel any pressure if you're way overswamped at the moment to participate. This is just for fun.  Let's take it lightly...

Lots of love and the best of luck to you all!

After three days of hunting Dr. ANB, I, finally, was able to catch up with him and obliged him to prepare an Operating Booking Form for my upcoming surgery.  However, I  must admit that hunting down someone like Dr. ANB whose schedule alone is as busy as a bee was never an easy job.  To add insult to the injury, the hunting was even tougher than I've expected since he is currently covering for Dr. HM.  Just my luck...

For the past three days, I spent at least an hour or so hanging out at the Fertility Clinic with the hope of having to be able to get a hold of the said doc.  My timings might have really been that bad during the first two days for I have never found a single piece nor a shadow of Dr. ANB.  Nonetheless, no matter how busy the nurses in the said clinic were running to and from one place to the other, I was very much entertained and lucky to have all their cooperation and support.  They were all very nice that they even tipped me the other details of Dr. ANB's schedule.


Persistence Overcomes Resistance!

A huge thanks to that philosophy that I was able to endure all the waitings.  I finally was able to seize Dr. ANB and convinced him to prepare the necessary papers.  I told him that I need a definite date for arrangements must be made with regards to my work schedule.  He was really so kind that he made me choose which of the upcoming Saturdays would I want the surgery to be scheduled.  I, of course, after having been able to check "my calendar of so-called social obligations", picked the 3rd Saturday for the Month of December thinking that it would be the most perfect time to be away from work...


Sick Leave On Christmas?

Well, I think it is now time to disclose to you guys that your Lady Bug here is an expatriate who is currently based in a country somewhere in Middle East where Christmases and New Years are treated like any ordinary days.  Here, we don't get to enjoy the same annual festive season that we used to enjoy way back home.  We get to work during Christmas Days!

As far as the surgery is concerned, I think that having the procedure done on 17-December-2011 will be an excellent timing for it shall provide me with a valid reason of taking a short break from work to celebrate a stress-free Christmas with friends and relatives -- Dr. ANB has indicated in the Approved Employee Elective Surgery Application Form that as part of my recovery, he is recommending that I undergo Five Days of Hospitalization and Fifteen Days of Sick Leave.  Just in time for the holidays...  Wow!

If my instincts serves me right, I really do feel that the upcoming surgery is one true blessing that I must be thankful of.  Jitters, of course, cannot be avoided but I am clinging more on hope and optimism.  I wanna stay as positive as I can and I really am hoping that this procedure will lead and advance me to the next level of my journey to conception...

Liebster is a German word which means "dearest" or "beloved".  It is also used to refer to as someone's "favorite" and the idea of the Liebster Blog Award is to bring attention to blogs with less than 200 followers that deserve more recognition and encouragement.

Today, I am much honored to have received two from Still Hoping of Hope Delayed and BW of Mummy, are we there yet?.  Two woman whom I admired so much because of their wits, courage and great faith.

Just as much as I wanted to keep the award for myself, there are certain rules that to be followed:

• Thank the giver and link back to the blogger who gave it to you.

• Reveal your top five picks and let them know by leaving a comment on their blog.

• Copy and paste the award on your blog.

• Hope that the people you've sent the award to forward it to their five favorite bloggers and keep    it going!

I guessed the rules are plain and simple that requires no further explanation.

I've been following and reading tons of blogs but I can only get to pick five and here they are:

• Jess of My Notes on TTC and Life.

• EndoJoanna of Living With Endo

• Amy and Robert of My Journey Through TTC... so far

• Allison of Praying for a Pregnancy

• myfertilityjourney of My Fertility Blog

So ladies, let's pay it forward and spread the love!

I've been spending quite some time tweaking my blog's layout.  I don't know what came into my mind that I feel like changing it.  My old layout's actually fine but there's just something that I am looking for which, up to this moment, I failed to determine what it is.

My blog's old desktop layout.  Shot taken from my computer.

I'm not sure if any of you have noticed that my blog's layout has changed for quite a number of times during the past 24 hours or so.  Well of course, you will only get to notice it if you regularly visit my blog...

My blog's fresh clean look.  Thanks to Webfolio!  Picture taken from my mobile phone.

Finally, I was able to find one template that suit me -- the Webfolio Theme by Site5.com.  It's a magazine style template that is widgets ready and lots of features built within it. It includes a slider gallery of posts, a search bar and comes with a full Blogger functionality.  But what I really love most about this template is it comes with a fresh clean look.

Okay, enough about the layout.

What about the topic of trying to conceive?

Of course, I have a little update to tell you guys...

After having been able to obtain the signatures of the appropriate authorities, my Employee Elective Surgery Application is now all set and ready to go.  I immediately paid Dr. ANB a visit to let him know of the good news but he was way too busy that he asked me to come back on Saturday for him to book me a schedule in the Operating Room.

Things may be moving on a bit slow but I'm glad everything's in the right track.  I surely would need lots and lots of love and prayers as I brave this part of my journey.  Lord, help me please...

My long wait is finally over.  After almost a month in the pipeline, I finally will be able to get to see my Fertility Specialist and I am just dying to hear what his findings are and what our next steps would be.

Unfortunately, I just found out from the attendant when I checked in this morning that my doc is still out for a vacation and that I shall be seen by a different physician. She must have read all my frustrations that she immediately uttered these words to me, "Don't worry, the doctor whom will be seeing you is as equally skilled as the other".

Okay, just for the sole purpose of having to easily identify which doc I am referring to, let's name my original Fertility Specialist as Dr. HM and let's call the Covering Physician as Dr. ANB.

Now, let's go back to the topic above...

The nurse introduced me to Dr. ANB who gave me a warm welcome.  As he was analyzing my chart, I just realized that Dr. ANB happens to be one of the hospital's Fertility Consultants.  With that, all my worries instantly disappeared in thin air.

Dr. ANB started off by telling me that all my blood works were fine and that my hormones are at a normal level.  He then asked me if I already am scheduled for a Laparoscopy because if I still am not, he will need to prepare an Employee Elective Surgery Form immediately.

Wait!  Didn't I mention before that I worked in a hospital and that I am entitled to a full hospitalization coverage (with no cost) which includes Dental, Obstetrics & Gynaecology as well as In-Vitro Fertilization or IVF?  I don't want to sound bragging but isn't that cool?

Anyhows, Dr. ANB and I talked about endometriosis, the ovarian cyst that I have and the need for a surgery.  Everything went on fine but it surprised me seeing what was written opposite of the "Surgery Procedure Required" field in the form -- Laparoscopy and Laparotomy!  I didn't know that there is also need for a Laparotomy...  I was only expecting for a Laparoscopy.

And of course, I asked Dr. ANB tons and tons of questions which were all answered satisfactorily. Of all the informations I've learned, what embarks my mind most is the fact that I shall be having what they call a bikini cut.  Yes, a bikini cut!

A Bikini Cut?

All my life, I haven't been to Pregger's World and yet, here am I, will soon be getting a cut and a surgical procedure similar to a Casesarian Section?  Boo!  I don't think that's cool...

Apprehensive I may be but what I am most sure of is the fact that I am very lucky and very much blessed to have the surgery and the treatment for free.  And for that, I am very grateful to God. So thank You Lord!

I don't want to sound complaining but how long do I really need to endure this severe menstrual cramps?  It hurt so much that it is enough to knock me off of my feet and interfere with my daily routine.  The twinges here and there feels like a punishment and Tylenol is the only friend that I can trust.  I am so tempted to grab my old friend Advil but having been able to learn how Ibuprofen's been unfriendly to Fertility, I am willing to bear the pain and settle for Paracetamol's subtleness.  I just wanted to put an end to this disease!

So this is it?  After a thirty-day wait and recently been able to dream of a big fat positive, Aunt Flow, once again, had shown her ugly face.  Though I still am not bleeding fully, I really can feel that she will soon come in full force anytime within the day.  I am now starting to feel that lower back pain that makes me too worried and afraid -- worried and afraid of the fact that I'll soon get to experience the severe pains and discomforts brought about by Aunt Flow's visit.

Just five days ago, I had this sharp pain in my lower abdomen that is enough to slow me down when I walk. The next day, I woke up very tired and fatigue was with me from that time onward. For the second time around since last month, I get to experience diarrhea two days prior to Aunt Flow's visit and while she is around.  Oh great, I think diarrhea would like to keep up with my cycle and I better get myself used to it.

Today, though I only have a light brown spot on my pad, I consider this as Day 1 of Cycle No. 3 of My Journey to Conception.  I just hope that this journey will not take that long and will just let me have my big fat positive...

but that was just a dream...  try... cry... why?

Look, I know I've been dreaming of seeing a big fat positive or bfp the next time I test but, to literally dreamt of a bfp is, I think, kinda obsessive.

Well, I guess I am...

I don't know but the dream might have something to do with me thinking on whether to test this morning or not.  Since Aunt Flow is scheduled to visit on the 16th and to save myself from the heartaches of seeing a big fat negative or bfn, I decided to hold it for a while and wait 'til Aunt Flow failed to show her ugly face. Physically, I might have succeeded from stopping myself from peeing on a stick but my subconscious mind might have responded to it the other way around.

At least, even if it was just in a dream, I was able to feel the joy of getting a pos. The dream was so real that I almost have believed it to be true!

I woke up wanting to pee.  I looked at the clock and it was exactly 4:30 AM.  My bladder felt like it was almost full so I went straight to the toilet.  While performing my stuff, I told myself, "Darn, testing is best done with the first morning urine!". Then, I crawled myself back to bed and smiled. Contemplating on what I have just dreamt of,  I praised God for the wonderful experience and begged him to please make it real...

"Bloated.  You look bloated!"

That's the morning greetings I received from one of my colleagues.  What the???  I thought I am losing weight and getting slimmer since I've been trying so hard to remove caffeine from my diet. In fact, during the first week of doing so, I tried substituting coffee with Celestial Seasoning's Green Tea (Decaf Mint) and I've lost an unbelievably 0.90 kg within a week of drinking one cup of it on a daily basis.

No kidding!

And how certain was I?

Okay, so here's the story...  I went to have myself checked on a clinic one Wednesday afternoon and as a Standard Operations Procedure, they had me weigh myself on a scale.  According to that machine, I was about 51.7 kg at that time and, considering my height, that figure was not easy for me to accept.  Hey, I'm in big denial, okay?   Anyways, immediately after I went off from my work, my dear husband and I went straight to the supermarket to buy some household needs and I decided to grab myself a box of the said tea.  Religiously, I drank one cup of it each day with the hope that it will aid me in increasing my cervical mucus.

Since I was scheduled for another check-up a week after I've initially been checked, I went back to the same clinic and they, once again, had me on the weighing scale. Unhappily, I went on with the procedure but my eyes grew bigger with what I saw from the scale -- 50.8 kg!  Such a big drop from last Wednesday's figures. Impressive isn't it?  And yes, drinking a cup of green tea a day was the sole change I made in my daily diet.  It's true.  I swear!

Unfortunately, no matter how overwhelmed I was with the effects of the said tea, I already am avoiding it since my Fertility Specialist had me on taking one tablet of Folic Acid each day.  Based on what I have learned from the world wide web, green tea interferes with the absorption of Folic Acid in the body which is very essential to the health of those women who are trying to conceive. Though the fact is still debatable, I decided to play it safe by dropping the green tea out and go for Twinings Revive & Revitalise Lemon & Ginger Tea instead -- a flavor which I have learned to love.

Whatever...  The fact that my colleague described me as bloated gave me a feeling of mixed emotions.  Though I am not happy to hear that I am gaining weight, it is, somehow, like music to my ears thinking that it might be an early sign of pregnancy!

Yeah right.

And there I go again...

Tres Onse or Three Eleven - That's how I'd like to call this day.  Not just because there are three elevens in the date (11-11-11) but also, this day marks our third year wedding anniversary.  Yep, that's right, we just turned three this November 11, 2011 and I just won't let this day pass me by without writing a little about it.

I had this smile on my face remembering how we planned our wedding to be witnessed only by a few people (only the closest of our friends and relatives) but ended up having at least thirty heads in our reception.  Whew, and that head count was confined only to the closest of the closest!  So, can you conclude how popular are we?  Just kidding...

Today, as we celebrate this special occasion, we, simple and private as we are, celebrated it with just a few number of people.  Three years have passed and still childless...  Ooopps, I'm just trying to sound sentimental!

Nevertheless, I thank God for blessing me with such a wonderful husband who's not just been playing as my partner in life but as my very best friend.  The only person who can make me laugh my heart out the way like no other person can do.  The only person whom I will spend the rest of my life with because together, hand-in-hand, we shall walk this journey through...

It's been a while since I've posted my last blog.  I guess, I really am a lousy blogger. However, I'm back and that's what matters most.

Well, as of the moment, I came to accept the fact that the second faint line I've got from my last home pregnancy test was, indeed, an evaporation line. Nonetheless, once in a while, the thought that I might have gone through what they call a chemical pregnancy still pops into my mind.  Hey, you can't blame me,  I really felt like I am pregnant during those times.  The symptoms says it all! Perhaps...

I've been spending quite some time traveling and having fun with my family and friends these past few days. God, how I miss all of it.  I have realized that I've taken this trying to conceive thing too seriously that I've let a lot of things ran me over. My senses has finally came back and from this day forward, I will try to take this journey a bit lightly.  I will try to walk myself through this in a whole new perspective.  Wish me luck my friends!